Almost everyone has looked in the mirror and wished they were more attractive in one way or the other. Undoubtedly, a combination of characteristics or qualities that form an individual’s distinctive character contributes to the concept of attraction. Indeed, our physical appearance does make it easier for people to be attracted to us.
Beauty, however, isn’t always a blessing; sometimes it is a curse. Being so good looking and smart could make one less desirable or trigger fierce competition.
In 2013, three Emirati men were deported from Saudi Arabia for being deemed too handsome. One of them was speculated to be Dubai fashion photographer and actor, Omar Norman Al Gala. Their supposed offense was being too attractive as authorities feared women could become attracted to them (1). Thus, they were ejected from a festival in the conservative Gulf Kingdom.
What a twist of fate!
How does personality influence attraction?
Research published some time ago in The Sun, a national daily, stated that women may desire smart and good looking men, but not too smart and attractive. This is because smart men may have poor social skills. Similarly, drop-dead good looking men are more difficult to trust. Too much and too hot to handle!?
Now, let’s consider a scenario with 2 individuals on two extremes. First-person is fit while the other is lanky. Almost everyone approaching these individuals is most likely to be more attracted to the well-built one.
Character and personality would come into play later but subconsciously, people want their DNA to survive and thrive. On this premise, the basic preference is to pair with the best mate with whom one can procreate and spawn better offspring with the desired trait(s). This is an evolutionary bias that slips into our subconscious.
Are our minds negatively biased against ugliness?
Ugly is subjective. As is commonly said, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
However, we are bound to make our offspring better and more adaptable than us. Seemingly, an attractive person is inclined to fancy another attractive person for a mate and to breed with over an unattractive person.
The concept of attraction is quite ambiguous; there is something biological about this. It is popularly believed that a region at the back of our brain, known as the visual cortex (in an area known as the fusiform gyrus) is stimulated any time our eyes behold an attractive face.
Even so, it turns out that the unique combination of sight and the back of our brain isn’t entirely responsible for the attraction, else, how would the blind know what’s beautiful or attractive? This then prompts the belief that hormones (and pheromones too) play a role in attraction.
Do hormones have a role in attraction?
This is well exemplified in a scientific documentary on a study focused on pheromones. Researchers sampled opinions from a group of women. They took a small group of men of varying degrees of attraction. From guys with nerdy looks and glasses weighing about 130 lbs to charming, model-like men with sparkling blue eyes, perfectly square jaw with abs weighing about 185 lbs.
To create a neutral ground, they each were given identical white tees and instructed to wear the same T-shirt for 1 week with no extra deodorant or special beauty care products. The interesting part? A set of a control group of women was blindfolded, which means, they were totally oblivious to what these men looked like.
The decider? Each woman had to smell the shirt and rate the person’s attractiveness solely on smell. Unsurprisingly, the ladies (every one of them) picked the charming guy as most attractive and the nerdy guy as least attractive.
While the result might be a little depressing for the nerdy guy, scientists concluded that women responded more positively to the pheromones exuded by the most attractive man. Hence, their brains without being led by sight chose him as the best potential mate.
Lest we forget, the attraction is also partly influenced by variables like culture and socioeconomic factors, etc.
The human mind is bias and decisions are made subconsciously. The brain is more likely to appreciate physical beauty and repel ugliness. Often times, we agree that what matters is inner beauty. This wisdom comes with experience and time. People may also be responding to biological cues of which they are totally unaware.
The chief and most important factor in a potential mate is their Aura. This somehow determines if we’ll be attracted to or repulsed by them.
On a personal note, I’m more attracted to people with positive vibes, soothing personality, and a good amount of innocence.
Do you think that our minds are hardwired to or that personalities, intellect, and skills contribute greatly to please, let us know in the comment section.
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